The Wedding Present Cup: Stage 1, Group 4

  

Group 4

• Don't Dictate
• Little Silver
• Plot Twist
• Crushed
• All This And More
• Whodunnit
• Science Fiction
• Whole Wide World
• Ten Sleep
• I'm From Further North Than You
• This Boy Can Wait
• Kill Devil Hills
• Hot Pants
• Loveslave
• Click Click
• Blonde

The Results

Generally speaking, I think that the random number generator I used to create the groups did a pretty good job of spreading out 38 years' worth of material. However, the general consensus among the panel was that this was a relatively weak set of songs, with some of them struggling to distribute their lower scores in particular.

Once again, cover versions did not fare well. Several judges expressed admiration for the original 'Whole Wide World' (by Wreckless Eric), but the most positive comment on TWP's version was Harry's not unreasonable assertion that it was not as bad as the attempt by The Proclaimers. Gav F got quite animated on the issue: 'One of my favourite songs ever, butchered by one of my favourite bands - the quality control on cover versions is non-existent; does nobody ever say “No, that didn’t work, it’s s**t, bin it”?'

'Don't Dictate', a cover of Penetration's debut single, was ranked at a fairly respectable 160 on Suddenly It's Tuesday ('one one of TWP's more successful covers: taut, sharp and pugnacious'), but attracted few points here. 'Sounds like any punk rock covers band playing in your local pub this weekend' was Keg's view.

Nestled between the two covers at the foot of the table was 'Kill Devil Hills', which only recieved points from Keg ('thumps along nicely') and Kirk ('nice breezy chorus'). John thought it 'a bit all over the place'; Johnny likened it to 'nails on a blackboard; Gricey's comment was simply, 'kill me now.' Another Going Going song that generally failed to impress was 'Ten Sleep'. Harry found it 'irritating' while both Gav F and Johnny thought it sounded like it came from an 80s computer game. 

The 24 Songs tracks in this selection struggled to attract many points, although 'Science Fiction' squeaked through in eigth place, largely due to John ('What David does best - impossible love') and Kirk. Some of the panel were not overly fond of the lyric, however: 'A comic reader’s lyric that suffocates a great backing track' (Johnny); 'The wincingly duff rhyming couplets grate too much' (Keg). 'Plot Twist' and 'Whodunnit' were greeted with indifference by the majority of the panel. 'A bit forgettable' was Gricey's verdict on the former; as for the latter, Mike 'fell asleep' listening to it, and Harry's response was, 'Who cares?'

The fact that 'Hot Pants' managed to accumulate 27 points is probably a good indication of how weak this group was; several of the panel awarded it points somewhat reluctantly. Bob gave it zero and suggested that it was 'lucky to get that.' Johnny's view was simply, 'pants.'

I was a bit surprised by the lack of support for 'Little Silver', which reached the heady heights of 52 on Suddenly It's Tuesday. Johnny was one of the few positive voices: 'Pulls you in and doesn’t let go. It grows, it builds and spits you out. Brilliant.'

At he top end of the table, 'Blonde' cruised to victory, getting a 10/12 from seven of the judges and at least a five from everyone. 'This Boy Can Wait' inspired a lot of glowing nostalgia. For example, Gav M recalled hearing it on John Peel and rushing into town to buy it in at a record shop called Spinadisc. Johnny called it 'fundamental, basic Gedge. It’s what got me here in the first place and will always stir the loins.'  That said, it did receive a couple of zeros, one of which came from Kirk: 'The clanging production hasn’t aged well on this and there’s better early stuff.'

Nobody gave second-placed 'Crushed' a zero. Bob enjoyed the 'beautifully crunchy bass sound,' Ian the 'full-on Gedge arm.' Five of the panel gave 'Click Click' one of their top two marks, making it by far the best-performing Watusi track so far. Several panellists felt it was a song that worked particularly well live.

'I'm From Further North Than You' qualified with ease, but was a little divisive. Joanna and Ali gave it their top mark; Johnny was also a fan: 'On the surface it feels like a simple little song, but there is so much going on in there that all comes together perfectly. Occasionally, the story that Gedge tells over and over again spills out in a defiantly more perfectly formed manner than the rest of the time.' On the other hand, several expressed reservations about the lyrics, especially the 'weird pornography' line. Gricey was particularly dismissive: 'Harmless but boring. Guff about bikinis and pornography. Meh.'

'All This And More' attracted a mix of high and low marks (but no zeros). A few commented positively on the lyric. Keg thought it 'a wry look at the burgeoning consumer society of the eighties'; Ian commended the 'pithy lyrics, the kind that he gave up on quite some time ago.' The other qualifying slot was filled by 'Loveslave', although even its admirers expressed some qualms about that video...

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